Facilitative Leaders excel at collaborating with others to reach sound decisions.  But online meetings present a unique challenge: How to tell when agreement is reached? With in-person meetings, you probably instinctively look around the room and note body language. You may even feel comfortable waiting to hear objections and, when none surface, feeling safe to assume agreement. Sometimes this is sufficient when you are looking people in the eyes.

Barriers to Agreement Online

Unfortunately, in the online world, we often don’t have access to visual cues like body language. Perhaps you’re faced with silence on the phone line and you take that as agreement. The response may just be compliance --- or, worse yet, somebody is multi-tasking and missed the moment entirely.

Making Agreements Online: Three Steps

Here’s a sure-fire way to advance discussions and reach true agreement in the virtual environment:

First, make a proposal.  Or, if someone else is making the proposal, clarify with the team members that this is the case. “Flagging” the proposal explicitly can help those who are (ahem) multitasking to bring their attention to the proposal that’s being made.

Second, check for understanding among the group members. This means making an explicit request for any clarifying questions from the group. This can help the individual who has made the proposal state it in clear terms.

Third, check for agreement. One strategy for checking for agreement is asking for verbal affirmation from each person in the meeting. Another is to use online meeting tools such as a “raise hand” tool or typing agreement in chat. Incidentally, this keeps people engaged as they know their assent is vital. If agreement is reached, make this a part of the meeting record.

Sometimes, it will be clear you don’t have agreement. In that case, ask the person making the proposal to explain his or her underlying principles or reasons. This makes clear the rationale for the proposal, and allows members of the group to think through ways to meet the needs expressed. Allow group members to suggest ways the proposal could be rewritten in such a way that they could agree with it. This is known as "add to/take away." Once it appears there is broad consensus on the new, altered proposal, check for agreement again.

Making agreements is a critical skill for Facilitative Leaders. Agreements are the "currency of collaboration" – don’t shortchange yourself and your team when meeting online.